Today we are surrounded by countless images from television, movies, internet about the need for a romantic relationship.
Often times it seems that everyone else has a date. Even Christians (especially some of the sisters in the Lord) agonize over their single situation. They’re tired of being lonely, they want to feel cared for….let’s be honest - they want to be married! But when they look around they find that there is a lack of eligible men.

Both men and women may feel that there aren’t any good believers of the opposite gender to be found.  But rather than addressing the issue of finding a good person to date, isn’t the most important question, “should Christians date”, be answered?

Well to answer the question, “should Christians date”, we have to first determine what the Bible says about “dating”. As Christians we have been bought and paid for by the redeeming blood of our Lord Jesus Christ on Calvary’s Cross. When we trusted in Christ’s finished work for the canceling of our sin debt, we were then adopted as God’s children. We find all of this wonderful information in the Bible. So it goes without saying that if you are a Christian, then you should be living your life by God’s Holy Word.

Although the Bible does not use the term “dating”, it is obvious from reading the Scriptures that pursuit of a romantic relationship should be  designed for the purpose of leading to marriage. Since marriage is the goal, a Christian shouldn’t engage in dating anyone that they do not feel is a suitable mate for marriage. That means that both persons in the dating relationship should both demonstrate a high level of maturity to endure the responsibilities that would come along with marriage.

Secondly, Christians should only date other Christians. The Bible states that Christians are “salt and light”, that they are “saints of God”, as well as being called “Believers”. Christians are taught by the Word of God that they are “in the world”, but not “of the world”. Since that is the case, it should be plainly obvious that Christians should not date unbelievers or non-Christians.  We are told to not be "unequally yoked" with non-believers (2 Cor. 6:14)..  Let’s break that down. That means no "Missionary dating" - dating someone with the hope that they will get saved.

Thirdly, Christians should not only reserve their relationships for only  Christians, but they should be devoted Christians. That is a Christian who is not lukewarm in their faith, not a Christian in name only, and definitely not a CME Christian - you know the types that attend the Church gathering on Christmas, Mother’s Day and Easter. A Christian should want to date someone who is serious about marriage and shares their personal faith and trust in the Lord Jesus Christ! Anything less and you’re just playing around!   Simply put, if you are seeing someone, they should be your spriritual "peer". 

 Lastly, speaking about “just playing around”, the Christian who is serious about dating should also be serious about having no sexual intercourse with their dating partner before marriage. That means avoiding compromising positions, engaging in sexually charged conversations and/or behavior.   And to be more clear about that, yes, any type of coitus is "sex" and falls into the same category.  To do otherwise will only lead to the serious sin of fornication.  Ideally, both men and women should have a trusted member of the same gender to whom they can be accountable.   An elder, a pastor, a believing parent...with whom they can be completely candid and honest about what is gong on in the relationship, and receive counsel.  By keeping everything open and in the light, the relationship is much more apt to follow a godly and blessed path. 

The consequences of the worldly version of "dating" can be very painful and trying.  And although God can and will forgive his children when they sin, to engage in such behavior only invites unwanted emotional and physical consequences in addition to bringing upon yourself God’s own chastisement and having a compromised testimony.